The Loss


Well now it's 2004 the end of which I will never forget. It started just like many other years, however around the middle things started to change. Margaret got a very bad cold and went to the doctors. She seamed to get better but still not well, so they done some more blood tests. The doctor said that her white blood cell count was to high but not to worry maybe she was just run-down.

Mum was getting very old and lonely and needed some looking after. Lyn and Bill were off to New Zealand for a long anticipated holiday that they had saved up for over many years. Val was off to England again to see the birth of her youngest daughters third child and help them as well. So Margaret and I decided to go and stay with mum till they all got back.

We caught the train from Adelaide to Sydney, it was a long trip nearly twenty-three hours and the weather was cold and Margaret caught another cold.

When we arrived mum was not well her back was giving her trouble again, so her doctor put her into hospital for some more tests. Margaret went to another hospital closer to mums house for some treatment. I was on my own at mum's but very busy, up in the morning breakfast then of to see Margaret in Canterbury Hospital till lunchtime. Then a bus to Bankstown Hospital to see mum. Then back to Canterbury Hospital and then home to mums have some supper and do the house work and bed. This lasted for about a week so not so bad.

Margaret was a lot better now but the doctor wanted to get more tests done. This took some time to arrange so we went back to mums, then mum came out of hospital as well.

All seamed to be normal Margaret had several tests done, just had to wait for results. Then one night after tea we were sitting down watching TV and mum said she did not feel well and had a little pain in the chest. So we called the doctor next door he came and had look and it seemed alright but had better get it checked at a hospital to make sure. So we call an ambulance it came quickly and pick mum up, it spent a long time trying to find a hospital that had room. In the end mum finished up in the Royal Prince Alfred in Camperdown.

Val was in England and Lyn and Bill were on there way to New Zealand, just Margaret, Don and myself were home. Phoned Don in the morning and told him what had happened he went straight to hospital to see mum. Margaret and I arrived a little later, I had never seen mum so sick and I was very upset. Don took me down stairs for some lunch and tried to make me feel easy about the situation. After week mum did not seem to getting any better, she had drips in both hands. Lyn and Bill had got back from New Zealand, Bill decided to go home and Lyn would stay in Sydney. Then one day mum called the doctor and said she wanted all the drips removed and just wanted things to be natural. Well I had never seen Don so upset so I took him downstairs for a coffee. Some days later he called Val and said she had better come home straight away, so she got the next available flight and was home soon.

Now it's the 17th of August 2004 Margaret has an appointment with specialist in the afternoon not far from were mum was. Don asked me to go the casino for lunch and he would drive me back before the appointment. Well as things turned out I was a little late but got there just as Margaret was going in to see the specialist. The news was not good, she had terminal cancer and was told to start treatment straight away. We then both went to see mum just down the road and decided not to say anything to anyone just yet. Mum had just been laying there and not moving for some days and drinking only a little, she was sleeping all the time. It was early evening and time to go home, every one said goodbye to each other and then I went a whispered in mums ear “I'm going home now mum be back tomorrow”, to every one's surprise she lifted her head and opened her eyes and said “It's my little boy Ross”. These words would be her last and I will never forget them. (right now the tiers a running down my face as I write this). So the joy of hearing her little boys voice some sixty years later made her very happy.

Margaret and I caught the train back to Belmore and had a late tea at the club, after which we walked home and talked about what to do. I wanted us to stay in Sydney so she could get treatment right away, but she wanted to go back to Whyalla for this so it take even longer. This was the third time and not my call, she would not listen to me.

The next day in the afternoon we went to see mum, she was just lying there and breathing very shallow. Val and Don, Lyn, Margaret and myself asked the nurse how much longer did mum have to live. The nurse said she did not know and would have to ask the doctor. The doctor came and said maybe she has already gone it's hard to know. So we asked what would happen if we had the oxygen turned off, she would just take a few breaths and go for the long sleep. Val, Lyn and myself searched our souls and decided that this would be the answer for our wonderful mother. The last of the Pivott's she could finally go and join the rest of family. So at 92 years of age on the 18th of August 2004 around 4:30 pm the most wonderful and loving mother the world has ever known took her last few breaths.

I was devastated, now facing the loss of my wife and no mum to turn too for help and advice. Mum had always been there to help me.

Andrew came from New Zealand and Kym came across from Whyalla to be with us at this very sad occasion, I was so very proud of them putting all else aside.

So every one said there last good-byes to Edna Mabel Pivott and would try to get on with a life without her in it.



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